May 1st, 2018

Micah ranked up to Eagle Scout (8 p.m) and made a College Choice Decision (8 a.m.).

I scanned and emailed Honors College and Scholar Forms that were due today…

We discovered that two physical merit badges were missing…which led to an investigation of a possible need to take a trip to the (far away) Scout shop (we didn’t have to…)

I had an unfortunate issue relating to a job that caused the overturn of purse and backpack-

which then led

to me forgetting to put my wallet back in my purse (unknowingly)

while traversing to a piano lesson and then the store- where I proceeded to fill my cart with needed items for dinner and unknowingly- no wallet.

To which God provided miraculously through said purse (but not through my wallet) 

which was then located at home, safely placed, in the wrong purse.

To which, then, dinner was made – and a Scouting Uniform attended to-

and then the grand load up of kith and kin to attend Micah’s major milestone-

which involved traversing in two cars- for a reason which shall remain un-named-

forthwith- we all arrived in due time and crunched together in one small room-

Waiting the momentous event and enjoying cell phone pictures of a wee baby bunny and

a pool newly opened- from Pennsylvania family

to which we were the happy recipients of the next Troop 9 Eagle Scout and a long, hard journey completed-

which, hopefully, oldest son will always hold in his heart.

Because, he

chose Eagle.

It was an infamous, difficult, anxious, finally completed

day.

And this verse-

Isaiah 40:31 ESV; emphasis mine

31 but they who wait for the Lord shall renew their strength;
    they shall mount up with wings like

EAGLES

they shall run and not be weary;
    they shall walk and not faint.

 

 

 

The School that Started It All

This came yesterday, January 24, 2018.

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This is the school that started it all. The journey to AP classes. The full-hearted, full-on, all in, test prep. The school that planted a seed of hope for what the next step of Micah’s life could look like.

We do not know if this is the end point, but this is a landmark, a monument, a remembrance stone.

This is (at this time) his first choice.

When we stared down the tunnel of college applications/admittance last year (winter 2017), we were fully aware that he might not get in to this school. But, like a flame of golden light, we lit up with hope at the thought of a rigorous school where intellectual inquiry was valued and he could have the satisfaction of interacting with classmates who were serious about learning; the joy of a robust, intellectual environment- with a cohort of like-minded students. There was/is this emphasis on… the pursuit of the good, the true, and the beautiful.

I heard about Hillsdale because a young couple at our church went there (met there and later married) and I was impressed by their intellectual and spiritual vigor; much as I was impressed by a couple from Grove City I also met at church.

I received very good advice from a trusted academic friend who told me to call the Admissions Office (when I had a question about a particular course requirement for senior year.)  When I called, they said they screen applicants carefully for aptitude and ability to succeed in their rigorous classes.(it wasn’t necessarily about whether he had physics on his transcript or not.)

Thus, began a true journey- for him and for me.

And…  now-

he got in. 

The beacon ever before us; the light ahead of him… helping him to press on and press in.

I know, regardless of whether Hillsdale is the final destination of this part of his journey, and the next step for the next one…

he will say: it was all worth it.

Yes. It is and it was.

Homeschool to College. 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Crying

So-

I cry

(just like I said, I really do)

this year

this senior year, launch year, goodbye year, hello year, one more year, essay year, test scores year, stretching, reaching, belly aching, hair pulling, memorize your face

year.

Well,

even for me, hold it in, swallow it back, stand up straight, knock it out

tears

seeping, weeping, trailing, leaking

(shhh…sometimes sobbing)

Birthing year, hurting year, hard year, grace year, hug you close, push away, watch

you fly.

Wonder….why?

Oh!

I cry.

On the start of this New Year 2017

This year’s notebooks- mine included, all loaded and ready to go for Monday.

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I am starting my 13th year of homeschooling.  I am starting my first senior year. I began when my darling(now seventeen) was four and his eager, precocious mind will forever be bound with mine as I cherish the memories of wonder and everything new. We are knit together in stories, in words, in love, in life. It has been a journey we all take together. I am grateful.

 

This year, more than any other, I find myself apprehensive. I am finding myself purposefully having to turn my heart and mind. I am finding myself full on in a season I could have never predicted or understood. Just like every season, really- as I recollect.

 

The world is spinning and I am spinning with it. Forever. Unending.

 

I find myself crying. I find myself choked. I find myself stretching out and breathing in the boundary places the Lord has established for me. I find myself rising up, determining to keep living priorities of my heart.

 

No one could have/can prepare me for the college applications, the classes, the world expanding life of these years. No one could have prepared me for letting go. Is it easier because there is still so much life in this home to nurture, to educate, to raise? To disciple, to influence, to mentor? To build traditions, to strew beauty, to love? No. It is not easier. It is one hard, each day daily walk.

 

And as I let my heart expose and as I reckon all the feels-

I know the only place for me is in Him. Forever stable. Forever refuge. Forever known and to know. All the riches and treasures of life. In Him. No matter the season. No matter the year. No matter the day at hand.

Lord, you alone are my portion and my cup;
    you make my lot secure.
The boundary lines have fallen for me in pleasant places;
    surely I have a delightful inheritance.
I will praise the Lord, who counsels me;
    even at night my heart instructs me.
I keep my eyes always on the Lord.
    With him at my right hand, I will not be shaken.  Psalm 16:5-8 NIV

This year, I have been confronted with a life outside my own in new ways. I have seen the visual of a calling other than mine. And it takes a lot of will to turn my gaze back at the messy beautiful that is mine. And breathe deep. Embrace.

 

This year, I need a fresh infusion of vision and a single-eyed determination.

 

As I struggle with the weight of all my life, I need the wherewithal to be still and small at the Lord’s feet.

 

Homeschool Mama, be with me as we step into this new year?

It helps to know I’m not alone.

 

How are you feeling at the start of this new year?

-Rebecca

 

The Things They Say

After several days too many, finally- its evening and I am down. I am curled against my favorite chair. A small son draped comfortably next to me. I am listening to eager chatter. So much eager chatter. And it is doing me

SO much good. So good.

An hour or so earlier, I was gallantly rallying reluctant troops. Trying to reclaim my domain. I was rising up… albeit sickly and faltering, but rising none-the-less.

He is talking, sharing thoughts, ideas, I comment about his schoolwork, I ask if his clipboard (school checklist) needs to be refreshed and suddenly, in the midst, he is speaking my very own mind…

how comfortable this chair is… how cozy sitting together… we are so cozy…

Then! in his very own trademark way…

“Tomorrow’s going to be ‘crack-the-whip day!’ Tomorrow’s is going to be ‘crack-the-whip-with-the-clipboard-day!”- he says emphatically.

Oh! How I laughed and laughed and laughed and laughed some more. And we raced together to this screen so I could capture it.

Because he is right. Tomorrow is going to be crack -the-whip day and he knows it all too well. May I reclaim my domain with grace and love and patience and sweetness and kindness and goodness….and not with whip cracking fierceness. 🙂

The Things They Say. Joshua.