Deuteronomy 31; Psalm 119; Isaiah 58; Matthew 6

Even today… I feel a frantic thread running, running… and I try to still. Even in this moment, cry to the Lord for help and healing…

Anxiety has always plagued me. In and out of life and seasons, it waits for me. There have been periods of time when the torment has been worse, much worse than others. And these have coincided- with seasons of physical imbalance and illness. And O! the relief when the anxiety abates and the frantic thread running through my mind and body finally calms and is still.

I am at 66 books today and the Lord has been so good to work in my heart through my assigned chapters.

Also… a section I did not write about- but that has had a big impact on my heart is this:

Matthew 6

22 “The eye is the lamp of the body. If your eyes are healthy,[c] your whole body will be full of light. 23 But if your eyes are unhealthy,[d] your whole body will be full of darkness. If then the light within you is darkness, how great is that darkness! ESV

When the whole of the inner man is darkness- so that the darkness is what comes forth out of the eyes to color all the world… O! I am pondering this in my heart- because, for the first time, the Lord gave me a fuller understanding. Light and Darkness. Full of Light. Full of Darkness. Speak to me, Lord.

Join me at 66 books?


Endless Gifts

The trees like black lace against the blue glow pale light of fading sky

The wee father bird with vibrant red head perched on the fence post watching, watching… over his sweet little mate while she ate her full

standing side by side with my love together- the weather so balmy and beautiful and us, trying to take in all that Maryland skyscape…and being able to share in it together and I so heartfelt glad to be there with him … behold all the color and shape…sunset glinting everything pink and gold and every kind of cloud glory… and then

evening driving home with a sweet son next to me and I declare and I truly do declare that these skies are just as glorious as our mountains are/were to us. They are. There is just nothing like it.

the “rainbow maker” crystal at last hanging in the window… and we wait for it. (And I do think for a moment- that Pollyanna made it look so easy and this really isn’t easy at all) But, even so, we wait for it with hope and now, every sunshine afternoon- the whole kitchen, ceiling, down the hallway bedecked with wee, happy rainbows… and when we send the ball gently spinning. O! Rainbow makers for my rainbow delighted girl.

the rings on our fingers glinting gold with weathered promise

how the blue bird always alights on the lamp post and I never lose that feeling of gratefulness… O blue bird, here.

Father’s Day.

the Lord – just speaking to my heart- quietly-

when I am able to make the perfect cup of coffee- wee bit of dark cocoa, some collagen, coconut sugar, vanilla nutpods. So so good. Coffee happiness.

a night out with my girl and GirlClub

home-made hoagie for Asher and a sausage sandwich- teen man food. Love.

Sunlight and breeze

A week at home

And now… photos… end of May through June








Chicken Enchilada Upgrade

Happiest birthday to my love, this day.

Celebrating in our style- with feasting and pictures, cards, some gifts, and cake!

And his menu is as follows:

Chicken Enchiladas

Spanish Rice

Italian Salad

Banana Cake with Strawberry Frosting

I am reposting our Chicken Enchilada recipe. Originally posted in 2010, we were not yet utilizing daiya cheese alternative which has transformed so many dishes for us! Now we use it weekly (on our pizza) and it is an integral component of this dish.

I took our recipe to the next level today with the serendipitous addition of canned coconut milk instead of rice or soy milk.  This coupled with daiya cheddar promises to be creamy, delicious… divine!

Note: today I forgot entirely about salsa and did not add any at all to this meal. Salsa and chips also makes for a very pleasing side to this meal alongside a luxuriant green leafy salad.

Dairy Free Indulgent Chicken Enchiladas

1 onion, chopped
2-3 cloves garlic
Olive oil to saute garlic and chopped onion
4 cups cooked, shredded chicken (at least)
3 teaspoons cumin
2 cans green chilis
1 container Better Than Sour Cream (divided ¾ to ¼)
1 can full fat coconut milk

2 Cups Cheddar Daiya -divided
Large Tortillas
Salsa (optional)
Cook onion and garlic in olive oil until soft and almost clear, but not browned.
Add chicken, ¾ container sour cream,green chilis, cumin seasoning, coconut milk, 1 cup daiya cheddar and mix.
Fill Tortillas with chicken filling and layer in casserole dish. (this makes two 9 by 13 dishes for me)  Spread remaining sour cream over the top of tortillas.  Add (garnish with) salsa as desired. Top with  the remaining daiya cheddar.
Bake at 400 for 20-30 minutes (depending on how crunchy you desire the meal to be.) You can also bake this at 350 for a bit longer, if you desire.




Mentoring Mondays: Mission of Motherhood Chp 2 Part 1

All quotations taken from 2003; Waterbrook Press

Chapter 2: Beautiful By Design

God’s Word, you see, gives us the map or plan for the family so that we might better understand what he had in mind for us. Few things will last after we die, but our children and their children will live throughout eternity. What we do as mothers, therefore, has eternal significance, so it’s especially important to understand God’s original intentions in this regard. Exploring his design for families and for and for motherhood cannot only help us understand what has gone wrong, but also how, with God’s help, we can move closer to the joyful, fulfilling, and vitally important role he intended for us from the very beginning. Chp 2 page 21

Have you ever considered that children are eternal treasures and your role as a mother has an eternal significance? I am working on this post, in the late evening and as I read these words, my heart is comforted. And I hope you will be, too. The mercy of God knows no end and is new every morning. As long as there is life, there is opportunity for positive impact, change, and growth. I am so grateful for the grace of God! I am also so dependent upon Him. It is only through Him that I can walk in this vital role. Do you see your role as a mother as joyful, fulfilling, and vitally important? Perhaps you are weary. I am. Let’s take a moment and quiet heart and mind before the Lord. Let us gain vitality and strength from Him!

It is important to note at the beginning that God started families when the world was perfect and no sin had taken place- that the role of “mother” was a part of God’s core design of a perfect life. The family was to be the unit of life through which all of life was organized. Each person would come into this world through a mother and father who would work together to give the family stability and purpose. Chp 2 page 21

“the unit of life through which all of life was organized” Do you see your family and your role in such a way? The family unit provides the grid through which all of life is organized, ordered, viewed, and comprehended.

Chapter Two deeply explores issues of motherhood and today’s culture. It presents the biblical foundation for this crucial, precious role as well as honestly underscoring the confusion, ambivalence, divided loyalty, and disconnect women today feel in response to children, mothering, careers, and life itself.

If they[women] absorb the cultural message, they may avoid having children at all or radically limit the number of children in order to leave enough time and energy for their “real” work. They may come to consciously or unconsciously resent the children who keep them from being “productive.” Or, more commonly, they will exhaust themselves trying to have it all- a successful career and a vibrant home life. They try to fit too many activities into their days and end up feeling that they are not successful at anything they do.

A whole generation of children, as a result, ends up feeling rushed and pushed, with little or no sense of comfort and stability of a satisfying home life. Without a strong, supportive structure for passing down righteousness, the morals of the culture become relative to the personal fulfillment of the culture. When the biblical mission of motherhood is devalued and disappears from culture, the whole next generation suffers morally, emotionally, and spiritually.  Chapter 2 Page 34

There is a lot of food for thought, encouragement, and biblical truth laid out throughout this chapter.  Perhaps, you, like me, can and/or are feeling discouraged, weary, and hopeless. In light of this- I will end with hope.

On page 36, Sally shares scriptures and truths that express how God is the God of Redemption. Wherever you (and I) find yourself today, there is hope and a way to move forward into wholeness, purpose, and goodness. From the end of this section:

We serve a God or redemption and second chances. When we acknowledge our shortcomings and failures to him, he is faithful and just to cleanse us from all unrighteousness, We can always start off with a fresh slate with the Lord and trust him to show us how to return to his original design. He has promised to support those whose hearts are completely his (2 Chronicles 16:9).

The most important factor in being a successful mother is to turn our hearts to God, to seek his will, and to allow him to begin making sense out of the messes we’ve made of our lives. He who created motherhood is the gentle teacher whose ways and input we must seek. page 36,37

It is never too late and it always perfectly right to turn heart and mind to the Lord and seek His will and His design. The impact of such posture can hardly be expressed.

Thanks for joining me here- as I personally seek to turn and turn again… and trust God to make something beautiful from broken-ness.



Deuteronomy 17; Psalm 104; Isaiah 44; Revelation 17

Psalm 104

Let the glory of the Lord endure forever;
Let the Lord be glad in His works;
32 [ae]He looks at the earth, and it trembles;
He touches the mountains, and they smoke.
33 [af]I will sing to the Lord [ag]as long as I live;
[ah]I will sing praise to my God [ai]while I have my being.
34 Let my meditation be pleasing to Him;
As for me, I shall be glad in the Lord. NASB

I am at 66 books today!

Join me there?


Endless Gifts

The glorious Maryland sunshine and blue June sky on a drive out to the country

The mockingbird on the roof-top belting out (different) bird call after bird call to our complete entertainment

The umbrella for the deck and the promise of a quiet, night-time sit with my love under the lights

Flowers in my barrel and in the front bed

Happiness by Need to Breathe and the laughing realization that I was caught (seen) dancing in my car at a stoplight by a friend from Church -completely unknown to me until days later

Us all in Church and the power of the message and the encouragement in my prophetic prayer over leaving friends

Abi’s first dance recital and her smile and the ballet bun perfection I accomplished and her flowers and her brave courage

A Hoagie for Asher and the first Youth Fellowship Night for him

Krista’s beautiful recital and the conversation with a HisWay mom there- and the healing and encouragement I felt

Every single part of the Schwenk visit

The driveway filled with a basketball game

the borax solution that offers true! ant relief safely

talking til the birds sing with the dear sister of my heart

The Big Van and

the two vans- washed

Taking time- to sit quietly, close eyes, and gather- ….gifts

Time in my sister’s home and her in mine. All her colors engraved on my mind and the bleach water shower solution and – just every second of the time…and thank you, Amy for bringing the teen decor for the 13 year old  birthday party tradition we have joyfully established. A total of 5 thirteen year olds between us- as of now. 🙂

Ensemble Intensive Blessing

My walk with Courtney and the comfort of her friendship

God’s grace.

I felt too choked…but when I chose to enter in, I found them.

And it is good.



These Days

I look back on my blog- and I can’t believe my last post was May 22nd. It has been a busy time. There have been (in no particular order) 3 different recitals, a birthday extravaganza- wonderful overnight guests, the SAT, ant eradication, graduate school (Todd),

an end of the year picnic, 16th birthday plans and gifts for a son turning 16 in July, a whirlwind overnight trip with my girl, music camp and driving school.

A lot.

And a friend and her family are moving away and I have been sad. I am sad. It is creating a lot of heart pain for me and a few of the children- and I think it is two-fold or rather- several layered. One, we have been the ones leaving for a new horizon and it hurts in a new way to be the ones left. Two, it brings to the surface a lot of pain from our own moves and the losses and changes in relationships. We are raw in loneliness and this rips it open a wee bit more, I think.

Also, this family was a tremendous catalyst with a lot of power to unite and gather people. It is hard to see them go and feel alone again.  They are/were a part of our church  (rare!) and the boys’ youth gatherings. They are/were a homeschooling family in our fellowship group. It is a loss.

So, I am choosing to turn this into an opportunity to trust and continue in meekness. We are in Your Hands, Lord. Bring people in Your time and in Your Way. Thank You for this sweet family and go with them and before them and behind them and around them in their new (far, far away) state.

Tomorrow- 66 books and there are Mentoring Monday posts in the queue just waiting.

And… now… I am choosing…Endless Gifts…

The Lord be with you dear reader,